*originally published & sent to my mailing list on 7-20-2020
How familiar is this:
“On the radio, we hear the voice of a politician we disagree with, and our body tenses; the mind starts to fire off a string of thoughts about his faults, the stupidity of his supporters, the disaster that will befall us if he’s successful. Or we hear the politician we love, and we feel encouraged and supported, perhaps self-righteous and superior.* This kind of reactivity doesn’t just keep us from being at ease; it reduces our potential to [hear] other people by trapping us in our self-centered views.” — Sensei Ben Connelly, Inside the Grass Hut, p.98
Are political divides destroying us? Each side believes they are right. At best, folks ignore an opposing viewpoint. Or maybe block it. Yet, how often are there derogatory judgements, condemnation, meanness, or — at worst — violently attacking (or actually hurting) another?
If you don’t think this is you, you’re not paying attention.
For helpful context, here’s the beginning of the paragraph I quoted above: “Steadiness amid change is a common theme in Buddhist literature. Early teachings recommend training the mind to stay concentrated on the coming and going of things, their appearance and their passing away. Without this kind of training, the body and mind tend to be swept up in a reactive froth of emotion and thought. On the radio we hear the voice of a politician we agree with ….”
To quote Stephen Mitchell, “This is how the I-know mind works. It’s lethal.”
Because most always, I really think I know.
Thank the gods I have decades of serious training that enables me to question what I think, while — at the same time — not losing my voice. But even with that much training, it’s hard. But here’s the only thing I know for sure: I don’t know what’s right. I can’t.
Neither can you.
It’s hard to hear. It’s harder to seriously consider this, to give space for this. Hardest yet, is to put it into practice. (Trust me, I know how hard this is).
While it’s hard work to do this, it’s not only the most freeing work, it’s also — in my very biased opinion — the most important work each of us can do for the future of humanity.
I’m reminded of a talk by Alan Watts I heard long ago where, to paraphrase from memory, he discussed the common abhorrence of conflict. Yet, whenever you eat, there’s a literal war going on in your stomach, acid attacking protein, etc, in order to digest and assimilate food. The stomach probably doesn’t know this, it only sees the war. I honestly have no idea what the stomach knows or not, but I can tell you: we absolutely don’t know anything.
***
Do you wish the other side could question what they think? Perhaps Ghandi that: be the change you wish to see by starting at only place you can: by questioning your own thoughts. By deeply questioning how you see things.
I mean, why not? Why not question what you think?
Because you’re right?
Or, perhaps, because it’s scary?
It is scary. It’s hard to go to that place of not-knowing. We lose our perceived control when we go there. It’s legit scary.
So how do we not-know? Here’s the good news: the work ultimately is just a daily practice of sitting in still silence. Don’t even meditate. Just sit there, and practice keeping your focus on the only thing you’re actually doing when you sitting there, doing nothing: your breath.
Start with about 5 minutes a day. But, do less if 5 minutes is daunting! After a week, slowly work your way up to 20 minutes a day (at the fastest, this will take 8 weeks; for most it’s realistically a year before they’re sitting for 20 minutes every day). All you’re doing is quiet breathing, and paying attention to that breath. That’s it.
Easy!
If you want help starting, maintaining, or strengthening a practice (because it’s seriously imperative you do), I have lots of free resources (eg, here’s a for link to a weekly free class).
But I might not be the right fit for you! That’s great! Let me know, and I’ll point you in the direction of other resources! I mean, even the Buddha knew this work is most easily accomplished as a group, so … either sit with me Fridays, or sit with someone else somewhere, but — for the sake of humanity — sit.
Want help? Join me Fridays. It’s free.
Preview for July 31, 2020's class: the teaching will center around Roshi Janet Jiryu Abels’ notes on Zen Master Shitou** in her book, Making Zen Your Own:
“Training ourselves to remain grounded … is the foundational work of Zen, which is why it requires such discipline and commitment. It is so easy to run away from the misfortune and pain, to become inflamed by it, to blame others, to try to avoid it, distract from it, gloss over it, or ignore it. This is not the way, Shitou tells us. Hold your ground with a still mind, be with it, and you will realize your limitless abilities to respond to anything with equanimity. This receiving and responding flows thought Zen literature as insight to be directly practiced, for enlightenment is found in the back-and-forth responses to life’s movement, not outside it.”
Could you imagine? How can it be that the very way to peace is through our back-and-forths? But this is the way. Again and again in the history of Zen, the great masters point that the way to, is through. We don’t get rid of. We don’t let go. We don’t eliminate. We don’t fix. We don’t solve. Rather, we look right at reality, and then… we just stay there. It’s usually uncomfortable. Very uncomfortable. And that’s the good stuff. That’s when everything shifts.
Join me Fridays, and practice sitting with reality for a few moments.
It’ll change your life.
Much love,
-kirstin
*FWIW: Inside the Grass Hut was published in 2014, i.e., the first paragraph quoted was written well before Trump through his hat in the ring…but it clearly could’ve been written yesterday.
**Shitou is the Zen teacher who wrote the poem Song of the Grass-Roof Hermitage that Sensei Ben Connelly studies in the book quoted above.